; mungkin nanti

A direct translation of Mungkin Nanti would mean "Maybe Someday."

The story behind this song, is from a guy to his former love. Telling her that if, and when they do meet again one day, let them not talk about their love, which is a thing of the past.

dan mungkin bila nanti
kita kan bertemu lagi
satu pintaku jangan kau coba tanyakan kembali
rasa yang kutinggal mati
seperti hari kemarin
saat semua disini

Cx treated me to Japanese cuisine for a birthday treat, and being the "DA XIAO JIE" he calls me, I shamelessly took advantage of his generous alter ego(hey it rarely appears okay!) and made him get me a huge triple sundae at a nearby cafe too.

There, he told me some things he sensed, which I can't deny I've noticed as well. The signs I've chosen to ignore and say nothing of for the moment at least.

"It's time you stopped acting blur Jov. You should open your eyes and cherish the people around you who's been treating you well, who treasures you rather than regretting it when you've lost them."

Besides referring to the other person, I wonder if he was talking about himself. SORR, SHAMELESS!

Cx has been a very good friend to me during this trying period. The best thing is that although he has openly admitted his feelings to me, he doesn't PUSH his affections towards me. He doesn't take over my life. I can sense his attachment, in very miniscule doses, and it's sweet, rather than overbearing. The situation between us is still friendly and in no way awkward. And for that I'm thankful. I tend to shield away from "I like you" outbursts after the previous episode, the mistake of a fling. Thus I've shunned Adam after his confession and now we don't even talk.

Unlike Adam too, he doesn't give advice I don't want to hear. I can be most infuriatingly stubborn, I admit it. I want what I want and I won't rest till I get it. No one with the exception of myself can change my mind. Adam told me a couple of nasty things Alwin did, or said, and told me that I should give up on him.

Not Cx. He told me that even though he loves me (strong words but hmm!), it doesn't matter to him whether we're together or not. My happiness counts the most, and he would be happy to wish me all the best with him if that's what it takes to make me smile. Only, the time isn't right now he feels, for me to try to reach out to him, who's probably still angry and would be hostile, and that I should leave it to time to heal the wounds between us. Very textbook Good Guy comments, but sincere nonetheless.

The other one is equally good as well, a shoulder of comfort and support. Takes care of me a husband would a wife. Ahaha. (:

But despite all the virtues, they're not him after all.

Because they're not, there's just something missing. Something I can't place myself.

And I'm sorry, but he's still the one rocking my world.

I saw our previous nicknames of long ago, and I had to swallow a lump in my throat, bite my lips to keep the tears from falling.

Matching ones, like
alwinrocksmyworld<3
jovinarocksmyworld<3
ilovejovinatobits&pieces.
alwinmyprecious!
i love my master.
i love my teapot.

And the ultimate, uber, superb, goosebumps raising ones,
jovina/alwin, private property of alwin/jovina. see no touch, touch no see, see and touch, pay money!

LOL. I don't really remember, but the logs are still there. And I saw a couple of things that made my heart skip two beats.

I think of JOVINA 99% of the time. And my team 1% of the time.

I want Jovina packed in a box and sent to my house.

And mentions of my previous.. people. Lei, Shawn, and something about having 20k and transferring to St. Francis to beat everyone up.

Sigh. I NEVER KNEW HE WAS SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT? But yeah well, past is the past I suppose. I need to look ahead. I've got my whole life in front of me.

The history of the past though, I like it so much more than the dreams of the future..

Give my tomorrows for one yesterday, just to know that I could have you here..